*~Positive Dani 2.0~The Avoidance of the Itchy Butthole~*

Posted on February 4, 2018 by

78 Comments

Hello my loves and I hope you guys have had a joyous weekend filled with reading, time with your loved ones or butt sex! Whatever tickles your pickle, I hope it was a joyous one! 

So it’s been a while since I have rambled on or had any posts that were in Dani-style articles that either make you shake your head or think “what is wrong with this girl?” Well I want to talk about positivity and positive self talk. You know affirmations and being mindful and shit.

I have the most difficult time just being myself and being okay with it or just even looking on the bright side. I have lately let the fact that my life and my body have been falling apart get the best of me. I waved that damn surrender flag. I stressed myself into ulcers and stomach bleeding. It’s just been a horrendous mess. One of my main New Year’s resolutions was to be flippin positive and I lost sight of that.

I mean when you think about it life can always be worse. Like today I was wishing I didn’t battle agoraphobia and I wasn’t on bed rest so I could go out on some real adventures. Well let’s analyze this for a moment. First off I am poor as shit. Like saying paycheck to paycheck would be an upgrade so if I could leave the house I would go to Wal-Mart and get groceries that are needed and trust me this reminded me to stay positive. Worse things can always happen!

Going to Wal-Mart is the epitome of a disaster. Either you are surrounded by the people of Wal-Mart which trust me in South Carolina is scary as hell or you’re going to have another issue. Other issues at Wal-Mart would include rude-ass customer service workers, you go in with a list and get everything besides what’s on the list or something like your butthole itches. 

I know what you are thinking. What does your butthole have to do with this? Well think about when your butthole itches in a public place like Wal-Mart! It’s killer! You want to itch it so bad but there are people everywhere you turn and the bathrooms have a line to just wash your hands! So you start walking strange and doing some kind of weird cupid shuffle to get rid of the itchiness but it just doesn’t work! Even if you were to get a chance to scratch, you can’t wash your hands because of that damn line.

So as my way of “thinking out loud” like my friend Pete @ http://beatlypete.wordpress.com/ does on Sunday, I am going to start being more positive! Pete does his “Thinking Out Loud” posts on Sunday so thinking of him got me thinking…. I may have to be on bed rest or scared to go in public but I am not stuck in public with an itchy butthole. So you always got to look for the silver linings in life and tell yourself these things!

Also I was not going to write this because people may think I’m weird but the thing is I am weird so it’s all good. I need to embrace my weirdness and embrace the fact that I avoided Wal-Mart and a public itchy butthole. 

So in conclusion, I am going to work on my positivity and seeing the good in all things and really try to get on track with my resolution! I hope everyone has a great day! I LOVE you all!

Category: blogger babes, funny quotes, health conditions, I follow back, sunday funday, thankful, UncategorizedTags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

78 Comments on “*~Positive Dani 2.0~The Avoidance of the Itchy Butthole~*”

  2. Oh, this made me laugh out loud. I know exactly that strange walk – which actually only makes the itch more itchy! Stay positive, Dani, and remember how much you enjoyment readers get with your posts.

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  3. Well…I could go into a whole comment pointing out all the things in which I think you are one of the most positive souls I know, or how much I appreciate your kindness and the wonderful posts you write for us each day…but for a change I am not going to do that, as you already know all those things (deep inside your heart you DO know this).
    What I am going to say is that this post made me laugh my ass, erm butt off…without having to scratch it at the same time 😂😂😂 You are not weird at all: I love your weirdness and incredible sense of humor: never change, ever, you are just fine as you are 😘😘❤️❤️
    Now you will have to excuse me while I am going to try and find my ass back 😂😂

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  8. It’s always hard to lose sight of being positive. I have that problem every day at work… you promise yourself you’re going to be happy and not let things get to you, and then that first customer just brings you right down and you want to swear at them and punch them in the face… day. Ruined. Lol! Just take it one day at a time and remember that we’re all here for you!! No use worrying because there’s nothing to worry about! Just the time to breathe, de-stress, and take care of you (I say as I’ve been freaking out because I’m going to be without the internet all next week and don’t have my posts ready so I’m losing sleep and losing my mind!Lol) But… do as I SAY, not as I DO! LMAO!!

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  9. I haven’t mentioned being positive for a while. I am still doing it, but I can tell you honestly, it’s a struggle at times.
    (By the way, thanks for the reference, but it’s beetleypete.wordrpess.com, not .com I won’t pay the extra for a .com as I’m poor too. 🙂 )

    OK, straight back to bum sex. I don’t do that one. I am not sitting in judgement of others who indulge, but it’s a case of ‘tried it, didn’t like it’. Bit too tight, and rather painful, as I recall. I prefer silky smooth and pain-free, just my choice.
    As for having an itchy bum-crack, that is a grat example of ‘age giving freedom’, at least where I’m concerned. Once the itch bites, I grab a handful of trouser material, and jam my boxer shorts in, for an obvious, but short-lived scratch. Sometimes, those itches are so itchy, I don’t care anyway. When you are 65, and look a lot like Yoda, it doesn’t matter at all.

    Great post, honey. Keep on being you, and keep on keeping on! 🙂 x
    Best wishes, Pete. xx

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  15. Oh my….. I’m not even sure what to say about those itchy buttholes except I’m sure they probably sell something at Walmart to help…. LOL

    Seriously though, always good to find that silver lining in anything out there when you can. 🙂

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  16. Oh girl, you be you! Weird, normal, boring, energetic…whatever, just be you. P.S. weird is never a bad thing. (I consider myself and oddball so I might be a touch biased.)

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Dani☆Touch My Spine Book Reviews☆

Dani☆Touch My Spine Book Reviews☆

Hey everyone! I'm Dani and I am a free spirited bibliophile!💖 I love meeting new people and being a part of this community. I have met the best people in the world being a book blogger and love them as family.😍 Here's some words that describe who I am in a nutshell: Book Nerd Girl, Custom-Made, Hippie Chick, Empath, Open Minded, Spiritual(but doesn't push), A Random Rambler, Loves Humor, Pansexual, Poly, Animal Lover, Book Molester, Life Coach, Psychology Major, Dyslexic That Was Self Taught With Books, Inspiring Author, Loves Others to a Fault!💖😍 The only thing I ask for on this blog is respect! Craziness and dirty joking welcome.💯 Discrimination and disrespectful comments can hit their asses with the door!💯📌📝

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